WRITINGS BY THE MOTHER
© Sri Aurobindo Ashram Trust

Discipline

Constraint is not the best or most effective principle of education. The true education should open out and reveal what is already there in these developing beings. Just as flowers open out in the sun, children open out in joy. Obviously joy does not mean weakness, disorder and confusion,--but a luminous kindliness that encourages what is good and does not severely emphasise what is bad. Grace is always closer to the truth than justice.

1961

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Mother, what should be done in a class when a child refuses to conform to a discipline? Should he be left to do as he likes?

Generally speaking, above the age of twelve all children need discipline.

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Some teachers believe that you are opposed to discipline.

For them, discipline is an arbitrary rule that they impose on the little ones, without conforming to it themselves. I am opposed to that kind of discipline.

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So discipline is a rule which the child should impose on himself. How can he be led to recognise the need for it? How can he be helped to follow it?

Example is the most powerful instructor. Never demand from a child an effort of discipline that you do not make yourself. Calm, equanimity, order, method, absence of useless words, ought to be constantly practised by the teacher if he wants to instil them into his pupils.

The teacher should always be punctual and come to the class a few minutes before it begins, always properly dressed. And above all, so that his students should never lie, he must never lie himself; so that his students should never lose their tempers, he should never lose his temper with them; and to have the right to say to them, "Rough play often ends in tears", he should never raise his hand against any of them.

These are elementary and preliminary things which ought to be practised in all schools without exception.

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One can be in psychological control of the children only when one is in control of one's own nature.

16 July 1963

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First, know thoroughly what you have to teach. Try to get a good understanding of your students and their particular needs.

Be very calm and very patient, never get angry; one must be master of oneself in order to be a master of others.

7 December 1964

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If you have to exercise authority, have authority over yourself first. If you cannot keep discipline amongst the children, don't beat or shout or get agitated--that is not permissible. Bring down calm and peace from above and under their pressure things will improve.

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And what should we do for the little children, Mother?

Oh, little children are wonderful! I see a lot of little children. People have got into the habit of bringing them to me. And the consciousness that is already there in those who are less than two years old, is magnificent. They are conscious. They don't have the means to express themselves, the words are not there, but they are very conscious. And so to scold a child, that seems...!

The other day, the day before yesterday, one was brought to me, and he was grumbling. And of course his mother... So I gave him a rose: "See! It's for you!" Of course, he didn't understand the words, but he turned the rose this way and that, and he calmed down. Little children are wonderful. It is quite enough to surround them with things and to let them be. Never interfere unless it is absolutely necessary. And let them be. And never scold them.

31 July 1967

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You are a good teacher but it is your way of dealing with the children that is objectionable.

The children must be educated in an atmosphere of love and gentleness.

No violence, never.

No scolding, never.

Always a gentle kindness and the teacher must be the living example of the virtues the child must acquire.

The children must be happy to go to school, happy to learn, and the teacher must be their best friend who gives them the example of the qualities they must acquire.

And all that depends exclusively on the teacher. What he does and how he behaves.

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The students talk so much in the class that I have to scold them often.

It is not with severity but with self-mastery that children are controlled.

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I must tell you that if a teacher wants to be respected, he must be respectable. X is not the only one to say that you use violence to make yourself obeyed; nothing is less respectable. You must first control yourself and never use brute force to impose your will.

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I have always thought that something in the teacher's character was responsible for the indiscipline of his students.

I hope you will give me precise instructions which will help me to keep order in my classes.

The most important is to master yourself and never lose your temper. If you don't have control over yourself, how can you expect to control others, above all, children, who feel it immediately when someone is not master of himself?

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To the teachers of all the infant classes

One rule which must be rigorously applied:

It is absolutely forbidden to hit the children--all blows are forbidden, even the slightest little slap or the so-called friendly punch. To give a blow to a child because he does not obey or does not understand or because he is disturbing the others indicates a lack of self-control, and it is harmful for both teacher and student.

Disciplinary measures may be taken if necessary, but in complete calm and not because of a personal reaction.

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What can I do to achieve a silent atmosphere in the classroom?

Be completely silent yourself.

Bring a piece of cardboard with you, about one metre long, on which you write in very big letters, black on white,

SILENCE

(much bigger than that) and as soon as the students start talking, put the cardboard in front of you.

Blessings.

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Never tell a child something it has to forget in order to truly know. Never do something in front of a child that it must not do when it is grown up.

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Never forget that a little child under six knows much more than he can express.

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